Up until recently (January 2018, to be exact), for as long as I can remember, I have had an irrational fear of being without my hair. Any time I would see someone with a bald head, I cringed at the thought of myself not having my locks. I thought that I would be ugly without it. I questioned if my head would be funny shaped. And if I ever found myself in a position where I lost my hair, it would take forever to grow back, or worse, not grow back at all. So basically, I thought it would be the end of my existence as a whole to be without my hair. Vain.

I remember tossing the idea around in my head, because I got to thinking about how scary it would be to have my head exposed to the world with nothing to hide behind. And oddly enough, the reasons I was afraid to buzz my head are most of the reasons that influenced my decision to go ahead and do it. My other reasons included:

  • wanting my natural hair color back
  • wanting a healthy, un-fried fresh start
  • I also wanted to try something new

At first I was still obsessing over how I appeared to everyone else. I wore beanies everywhere, and I freaked out every time my little unruly hairs didn’t stand the way I tried telling them to. It took time before I realized how little importance comes from an outward appearance. I am not my hair. Now that all is said and done, half a year later, I see that this has been a deeply rewarding experience. The way I used my fears to power my decision have a positive influence on me today because:

  • I no longer obsess over how I look
  • I know that my value doesn’t come from my hair or any other part of my outward appearance
  • I am saving on time, shampoo, and mental energy
  • It also helped me to see who was really, truly supportive of my decisions as an adult

I personally recommend this experience to anyone currently reading, because if you’ve never done away with your tresses, you’ll never experience the benefits that come from that. If you deal with fear and confidence issues, I can say that this has helped me, so it may or may not help you. I can definitely tell you that it is a fun way to switch things up. Time for a change? Consider the buzz. If you spend a lot of time on your hair(shampooing, conditioning, treating, trimming, coloring, blow-drying, straightening, curling, etc.), you will save on time and be able to use it for things other than your image, if that’s what you’d prefer. And something I’ve also learned firsthand that may work for you is that you will find out who is really supportive of your decisions, especially if you live in the Bible-Belt, where people tend to get judgy if a woman doesn’t have a lengthy mane. I have taken a step closer to standing in my decisions as an adult, and that is a very powerful thing to learn.

I would also like to say that I probably wouldn’t have done this without my lovely partner in my life, who you may see referenced as ‘my Honey’. He promotes me thinking for myself, and he helps me to realize when I’m wrong and provides supportive guidance. Without his help, I wouldn’t even have this blog, so to him I am forever thankful for everything he does for me, including helping me think outside of my box.

 

Categories: Insightful Stories

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